About the Method

The Little Manipulator

Date: June 6, 2013 Author: admin Categories: About the Method

At 3 years, kids already begin subconsciously manipulating adults. During this time, parents notice that their little one is becoming increasingly capricious and demanding.  How to help both child and parents alike?


A soft approach

Not all parents are equipped with the patience to react calmly to all the whims and sudden changes in the mood of their child. Meanwhile, the behaviour and development of a 3-year-old depends, first and foremost, on the behaviour of the parent. Learn to understand your child and adjust to his mood without losing your position or caving in to his whims. Here is a simple example: A child refuses to solve a task, and she begins to cry and is now on the verge of hysterics. Parents in this case should back off. “If you don’t want to do it now, then you don’t have to. We’ll do it later.(next time). So what shall we do now?” In this case “the wolves are fed, and the sheep are safe.” Everybody is happy, and there are no hard feelings.


It is preferable not to give the child a guilty conscience by threatening him with punishment or forcing him to do something immediately, or else. For example:


“You’d best do this now, or I’ll tell your father! You won’t get any sweets! We will not go for a walk!”


Not only will you lose your nerve, but you won’t get anywhere. The child not only gains confidence in his power over you, but then proceeds to act this way with a vengeance.


Let’s shift attention

There is one more great way to “repel the little manipulator:”  Try to progressively make use of the child’s own energy by, for example, by switching her to another activity.


“You don’t want to go for a walk? We can draw together, or guess shapes.  We’ll take a walk later. What do you think?”


Childhood development from the age of 3: The creative process

When an adult speaks, a child listens to only those words that he wants to hear. So, let’s wise up, and be attentive to what was said. Those expected words are more effectively accepted by the child. Never raise your voice because the child may take offense and try not to listen. That tactic won’t get you anywhere.


Besides, a child is always waiting for approval of his actions. Maybe, for a while, it is worth forgetting about the bad and concentrating on the good? And then tactfully, without pressure, talk to the child about his mistakes.